Tag Archives: Comedy

AMF FIGHT ONE

Donkey VS. Unicorn

A simple female ass
Eats upon elegant grass
When a female unicorn
Shines her beautiful horn
Walks out from the forest crest
The donkey sees thinking she is best
Stops eating and hardens her skin
As soon a battle will surely begin
The unicorn puzzled at first
Will be happy to fulfill the donkey’s thirst
For too long the donkey’s foul mood
Corrupted the unicorn to brood
Enough was enough the unicorn begins her charge
Making a stand against this rot filled barge

The donkey only gives a welcoming sneer
And jumps to the side, but the unicorn slips
Turning suddenly her horn hits the donkey’s rear
Piercing deeply into the thickened skin
And with the forward motion of the unicorn
Comes a loud snap, as she leaves the horn in
The donkey hee haas in incredible pain
Trying to bite out her massive splinter
But unable to reach, it will remain.
The unicorn only laughs and walks away
As the donkey limps after
Trying to force the unicorn to stay
Finish this one sided fight
Even though the donkey could not continue
The unicorn wonders off to eat some grass
As the donkey sits and mends her wound
The unicorn forever to be the pain in her ass

Advertisements

Liquer

Liquer

It is but a Friday night
Last minute plan for a party
As underage kids hide from sight
Hangovers will make people tardy

Morning after makes for painful thought
Try to remember what we forgot
Cans, food, bottles all about
So many you have lost count

Pale skin and desperate thirst
Flashes of what could be worse
Half naked friends covering couches
Extremities in each others pouches

Floors sticky with spilled booze and beer
Recalling brief flashes never quite clear
Daylight burns your eyes
As a girl silently cries

Loosing what we give up once
To a man she thinks is a dunce
The bonfire is just cinders
As more awake from last nights binder

Stumbling around the fire pit
Some struggling just to sit
Using unfinished beer to kill the fire
The party is all but retired

Consequences follow bad choices
Signs of which are moaning voices
Though you seem to be okay
And its just another day

You had fun and didn’t go over board
Avoided blackouts shameful sword
Kept your head in the mist
Dodge the smog that did exist

Sober now you climb into your car
Coughing up cigarette tar
Off to home you now set
Realizing that your pants are wet

Written for Party people everywhere, and those who have retired from the scene


Road Rage~ Thursday rally

Road Rage

Red light why wont you turn green
Red light do not be so mean
People are expecting me you see
This is no time for you to cage me
I know because of the cars in front
You will change but its just a stunt
Back to red you will undoubtedly go
As I move forward in the row
Inching towards my destination
Fighting back my aggravation
Cursing at you though it does no good
Cause you never change when you should
I am going to be late for my promotion
So can we please have this line in motion
I should have never pulled over to get breakfast
Then I wouldn’t be stuck here beingĀ  moved past
I can actually see the light turn green now I am getting close
Two more rounds and I know I’ll be able to remain composed
What the fuck is that guy on the bike doing
Passing by me while my anger is brewing
I think I should just open my door
Put that damn biker on the floor
All right I’m at the front of the line
I no longer have a reason to whine
Come on red light turn green
I am done with you being mean
Turn Green, Go already, Change, Come on, Do it
I push the peddle to the floor, oh shit
As it turns green and I take off into the intersection
Just to have my progress face forceful rejection
Driver side door smashed into my head
Holy fuck now I am totally dead
I fly up to heaven only to whine
Cause now I must wait in another line

My strange attempt at comedy :D. Hello all new visitors, please do me a big one and check out my previous postings, i recommend The butcher The baker, The Candlestick maker, or Last Man’s Journal just so you have a feel for my normal work YEP YEP