RSVP


RSVP

“I wake up staring at the empty side of the bed
With memories and thoughts of you in my head
I did receive your call the other day
I am happy to see you found your way
I came home yesterday and checked my mail
To see that your happiness did prevail
The wedding invitation you had sent me
Proving that you were completely free
Of thoughts about our former life
Of ever being my  future wife
Staring at the picture of you and your man
Reading about your grand wedding plan
Picturing myself standing next to you
I know that this view is forever askew
Years have passed for both full of change
Our past is tragic and will never rearrange
I hurt you, you hurt me, we killed our chance
We are just known as fallen failed romance
Yet I hold this invitation with with painful thoughts
That caused my broken heart to fill with knots
I always wish for your happiness
Every day that I am without bliss
I moved on alone and dated other girls
Who I never would buy any pearls
I realize now that we made a mistake
That I wasted my chances with being fake
Never seeing what it would take
So tonight I shall lie awake
contemplating about what I should say or do
Fighting back the cold as I think about you
Not a day has gone by, that I haven’t gave a sigh
Thinking of why our tender love had to die
Staring at this invitation with sorrow
That I wont wake up to you tomorrow
What do you expect now, I don’t know how
To please your request with a heart of disavow
For all the things that I remember
Its to hard for me to be a member
Of the greatest day of your life
As you become your lover’s wife”
I open the black box I keep
Full of pictures that make me weep
All the treasures of our past
Pictures of smiles that never did last
They say that its never to late
That love belongs to fate
Everyone deserves a clean slate
That we all have a soul mate
That I find all bull shit
As I am trapped here in this pit
My soul mate has another match
That seems to be a better catch
So do I go to the wedding to fight
For what my heart believes is right
Make an ass out of myself in front of her friends
Oh God when will these horrid feelings end
I have no right to interfere
With who you choose to hold dear
To go and wear only a sneer
As my heart is full of fear
Though my eyes are very near
To releasing out a single tear
I shall hold my ground in front of them
To refuse myself being one of the condemned
Why does this letter effect me so
Why does your happiness bring me low
Why does my heart feel like snow
Why does my soul live in woe
I can’t replace my feelings for her
I can’t try to find loves transfer
I can’t concur, I only prefer
To live in the false memory
Of a life in a broken category
Of former love and glory
To live in an already ended story
What do I do? Should I just stay
So I don’t ruin her special day
“I am not ready for such a big step
I am not ready for such an attempt
This is my RSVP denial
For I can’t face this trial
I am happy for your success
Though seeing it has caused my regress
Goodbye and good luck my darling
I am sorry to you I was just a fling
I can’t go and not be me
So I wont to let you be……….free”.

Disavow: verb: refuse to acknowledge; disclaim knowledge of; responsibility for, or association with

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About shoelessboywonder

Poet and cook, I'm just starting out in the web world trying to grow a fan base for my poetry, it seems like its off to a good start and the site is also made for me to improve upon my writing skills so please rate and comment on the poems you like best, feedback is the greatest way to success thanks for checking me out and my site. View all posts by shoelessboywonder

5 responses to “RSVP

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